Growing Wings

Forgiveness may be the most difficult to learn of all life’s lessons. Regardless of whether that forgiveness is for our own actions or for the actions of others, forgiveness is a tough process.

And I wonder if self-respect is really at the base of forgiveness. We want to have self-respect, we pretend we have it, but since forgiveness and respect go hand in hand, maybe they are both more difficult than we’re willing to admit.

Admitting our failures, our missteps, our stumbles takes courage. And even more than courage, it takes over-riding the voices in our heads that point out the mistake – over and over and over and over.

Monitor your head-talk for twenty-four hours. Notice the judgment or harsh words you may use against yourself. Notice if you hear, “that was dumb” or “why’d you do that!” We didn’t come into this world with those words. Where did you learn them? If you wish to retrain your mind to be more accepting of yourself and others, you can. What word would bring your mind peace? Say it often to yourself when you notice mind-chatter.

Monitoring the head-talk and changing the way we speak about and to ourselves is a clear step in learning self-forgiveness, and learning self-forgiveness is the next step in learning to forgive others for their missteps. Self-respect and respect for others then replaces negativity.

And when we begin to free ourselves from negativity, when we lift the weight off our shoulders, we grow wings.

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